Emotional Challenges of a New Mom

 

*this article is not in reference to Post Partum Depression (a treatable medical illness).

‘Sleep-deprivation, postpartum pains and constant nursing’, all these are from one box of challenges for a new mum.But the other box of Emotional Challenges stays hidden in the dark and rarely talked about.

It’s more like the mystery box you see in reality shows. Everyone gets one but no one knows what’s in it.

So what can be in that box? Fear, sadness, anger, doubts, isolation, emotional exhaustion, irritability…

All these usually occur in initial weeks after baby’s birth. Suppressing instead of dealing with natural emotional challenges, takes a toll on your emotional health. So while you push hard to make everything work from taking care of the baby to managing yourself, house and social life; there is a dark-hole that you might slip slowly into.  And then the monster of suppressed emotions conveniently hunts you down.

You feel like you are sitting alone and still while the world keeps moving on in front of you. Smallest of the things might frustrate you and you wouldn’t recognize yourself anymore.  You imagined a perfect mother-baby bond but you can’t help being irritated. All this and much more can happen but what can moms do about it?

Understand and remind yourself:

These challenges are only natural after sudden physical and social changes for a new mom along with hormones doing tango.  Accept and deal with them do not suppress them.

Be mentally prepared:

 Concept of social and psychological preparation of expectant mums for the ‘mother hood’ role is alien to us, hence increase in Postpartum Emotional Distress. From baby’s nursery to nursing and pooping, mums to be prepare for everything except for these mystery box items. Mentally prepare yourself, it might or might not happen.

Keep things simple

This is the KEY. All the fancy arrangements and exaggerated social affairs look great but they are not what your baby really needs. Babies just need to be kept protected, fed and clean. All the other things are add-ons, do them as long as they don’t cause stress.

Be your own guardian angel:

Yes, you, mommy! You better take care of your own self. That’s the only self you will ever have.

You are what you eat:

Maintain a healthy diet; eating badly or skipping meals can make you feel tired and irritable, so try to eat simple and nutritious meals.

Share your feelings:

Feeling understood and supportive helps a lot, talk to people you trust. Join a mommy group, meeting others in the same position will give you a chance to share skills and experiences, to realize you are not alone, and above all get some emotional and practical support.

Take help:

Family, friends or from a professional, take whatever help you can. If someone tries to make you feel bad about it, understand their opinion does not matter but mental and physical health of you and your baby does.

                                               This too shall pass!!!